Never On Sunday

My folks have a Japanese beetle infestation—not exactly a biblical plague, but enough of a nuisance that they go out and scour the garden, killing them by tossing them into a jar of soapy water. So when I saw on sitting on the edge of the toilet this morning, I grabbed a tissue and crushed the little creep. Then, since it was right there, I tossed the tissue and bug together into the toilet bowl. Then I went about my original business. Dinner the previous night had been an extra-spicy jambalaya, which is why my business was so urgent.

There’s a joke about the last thing to go through a bug’s mind when it hits the windshield of a car: its ass. I’m guessing the last thing to go through a Japanese beetle’s mind as it swirls down the bowl is “Worst. Day. Ever.”